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Showing posts with label alan s. Show all posts
Showing posts with label alan s. Show all posts

Thursday, 23 April 2009

Anthony Hopkins and Jodie Foster are together again


The Metro posted this excellent photo. Anthony Hopkins and Jodie Foster recreate a scene from The Silence Of The Lambs as part of a 20th anniversary issue of Empire magazine guest edited by Steven Spielberg.

Thanks to Alan S for pointing it out to me.

Leave a comment on this post below.

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Friday, 3 April 2009

Are they really saying that it will trim a bush?

This is the ad for the new Wilkinson 2-in-1 Quattro for Women Bikini. I'm posting this purely because the whole bush being trimmed thing made me laugh.

Thanks to Alan S for pointing it out.

Leave a comment on this post below.

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Friday, 27 March 2009

If you think the 118 247 advert is familiar then it must be Magical Trevor


Apparantly, Weebl, who made the original Magical Trevor, also made the recent advert for 118 247. Here is Magical Trevor in all his glory.

All together now:

Everyone loves Magical Trevor
'Cause the tricks that he does are ever so clever
Look at him now, disappearin' the cow
Where is the cow heading right now?

Taking a bow, it's Magical Trevor
Everybody seen that the trick is clever
Look at him there with his leathery, leathery whip!
It's made of magic, and with a little flip

Yeah, yeah, yeah, the cow is back
Yeah, yeah, yeah, the cow is back
Back, back, back from his magical journey
Yeah!

What did he see in the parallel dimension?
He saw beans, lots of beans, lots of beans, lots of beans. Oh, beans lots of beans lots of beans lots of beans.
Yeah, yeah!

Thanks to Alan S for sharing.

Leave a comment on this post below.

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Monday, 2 March 2009

The Mighty Boosh - Cool art work

I just think that this is a cracking piece of art work by the mighty Joe Murtagh. It is Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt as Vince Noir and Howard Moon from The Mighty Boosh.

Check out Joe's official site for many more pop culture pieces of art work.

Cheers to Alan S for pointing them out.

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Friday, 27 February 2009

The Neverending Story - The Early Years

Thanks to Alan S for sending me this.

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Wednesday, 14 January 2009

Exclusive Interview - Ryan Denmark - Romeo & Juliet vs The Living Dead

January is the month of interviews it seems (weirdly Jason X gets mentioned in the two January interviews). Today I have an interview with director/produce/editor Ryan Denmark who's latest film is Romeo & Juliet vs The Living Dead (R&JvTLD). With a title like that you know it is going to be good fun.

When not making low-budget independent horror films Ryan is also Associate Editor for Spike Lee and an actor in films such as Klown Kamp Massacre and Last Looks. He also has dodgy taste in popcorn, but I can look past that.

I've previously posted the trailer for R&JvTLD here.

- Why was the vehicle of a classic, such as Romeo & Juliet, chosen to expand the zombie genre? Can you tell us a little more about the film and the making of it?
My fellow writer/producer Jason Witter had some success in New Mexico staging Shakespearian pop culture parodies in local theaters. Specifically, Hamlet the Vampire Slayer and Macbeth in Space, which was basically Aliens with a little Jason X thrown in. I was home (home being Albuquerque) visiting when I learned that I had three months of free time before leaving for Italy to work on Spike Lee's film Miracle at St. Anna. Jason wanted to do a Night of the Living Dead parody on stage. At first, the idea was just a straight parody and then I suggested mixing it with another Shakespearian piece. Parody requires a certain amount of audience familiarity with the subject to be successful and Romeo & Juliet is Shakespeare's most recognizable play. Jason and I have a long work history and obviously Shakespeare had already done all the heavy lifting, so the script went quickly. We had a brief pre-production period and then shot in about 28 days. Of course, the basic idea for the film is Juliet, of noble Capulet birth, falls in love with Romeo, a zombie and hilarity ensues...that only goes so far. We needed more or it was going to be a one gag show. For me R&J is a parable about how hatred consumes everything around it, but there is this popular notion that the play is the world's greatest love story. It's a worship of hysterical juvenile love. For that reason, the play (or at least the popular reading of the play) has a lot in common with 80's teen romance films. So when we approached the script we were influenced by films like Valley Girl and Pretty in Pink. We expanded the character of Mercuitio to create a love triangle and away we went. Everything flowed from there, including our answer to the problematic question everyone asks, "If Romeo is already dead, how does he kill himself?"

- What was the toughest thing about making it?
We're a low-budget independent film. I mean in the the literal sense, not the Hollywood sense. What polish we have is due to the talented cast and small crew of the film. It was a team of people who love filmmaking and weren't afraid to bleed for it, or at very least work long days with no pay for it. Jason and I worked 18 hour days, 6 days a week. Still we couldn't have done it without our co-producer Jess Jones. She also served as our production & costume designer. She's like a superhero with better fashion sense. As a director, the biggest challenge was striking a balance between the inherent drama of Shakespeare's plot and the obvious absurdity of the zombies. I found the comedy worked best the less we reached for it.

- How did you get into the film business?
I started college as a computer science major, but after a few weeks of reflecting on the optimal code for search algorithms, I found myself praying for spontaneous human combustion. On a whim I took an elective in film production at the University of New Mexico and found that filmmaking (particularly editing) was just something I could do. You know, like Mozart at the piano or Carrot Top at prop-comedy. For years after, I made short films in Albuquerque, but my real break in "the business" was when I met Barry Alexander Brown at a local film festival. Barry is Spike Lee's editor. Shortly after we met, he called me and asked if I wanted to be his assistant editor on the film She Hate Me. That was in 2003. I had two weeks to drop out of college, drop out of my life and move to New York. I did it and now I'm the associate editor for Spike's feature films and most of his TV work.

- Regular LFF Reviewer, Alan S, had this to say " Can we take other Shakespearean classics and given them a rom-com-zom twist? For example: The Merchant of Venice Beach - Shylock is a body-building Jewish zombie, who instead of giving a pound of flesh needs to eat a pound of flesh in order to keep his zombie traits in check so he can still work out his rotting carcass and woo the passing Barbie-doll look-a-likes in rollerboots?"

If you happen to use that scenario I'll put you in touch with Alan to discuss the rights! :)


Wasn't that the plot to Doctor Zhivago?

- A few people have mentioned the similarity to your film and the films by Troma (The Toxic Avenger, Class of Nuke 'Em High, Red Neck Zombies, etc). Do you think this comparison is justified? If so was it an intentional choice? What is your favourite Troma movie?
My favorite Troma movie is Kung-Fu Kitties (2004 Tromadance short.) That's a shameless plug for my friend David Valdez who just directed Klown Kamp Massacre (featuring an appearance by Lloyd Kaufman). The truth of it is that I think I've only seen two Troma movies: Toxic Avenger and Surf Nazis Must Die. I saw them both when I was but a wee lad and don't remember them much. Oh, I take that back (and am unwilling to use my backspace key) I'm very fond of Cannibal: The Musical. Shpadoinkle. It's certainly a comparison I've heard before and I'm sure this won't be the last time. I don't think it will hold up after people see our film. Troma films are much more violent than R&J. Anyone hoping to see Romeo peel back Tybalt's skull and eat his brains while a bikini clad starlet screams in petrified terror is going to be sorely disappointed (and better off going to see Klown Kamp Massacre!) There is a prerequisite amount of violence in R&J, but we're really emulating 80's teen films, not b-movie horror. We have much more in common with Pretty in Pink than say Dawn of the Dead.

- We seem to be getting more and more zombie films, why do you think they are so popular? Which is your favourite film from the zombie genre?
This is true, you can't swing a dead cat around the Albuquerque indie-film scene without hitting a zombie movie. It's a right of passage and this is my contribution. We wanted to do something that stood out from the crowd and I assure you that R&J does. Love it or hate it, you've never seen anything like it. The closest is probably Shaun of the Dead or Night of the Comet, but even those films are more conventional than R&J. As for my favorite (forgive the American spelling), I'd have to say Dead Alive. I like genre films that aren't afraid to break formula and even conventional wisdom for the sake of trying something new. I think filmmakers gravitate toward the genre because horror is the easiest market to find low-budget distribution and zombie horror is probably the easiest to pull off in terms of production value.

- What law would you abolish?
Murphy's. That's my witty answer. There are in fact dozens of them I could mention off the top of my head, but my current events answer is California Prop 8. It's an attack on civil liberties and a line in the sand for those who would like to consider themselves socially progressive. It's time for people to choose a side. I'm unwilling to think of this issue as something we can all 'agree to disagree' on anymore. I don't regard it any differently than if someone advocated making interracial marriage illegal. Discrimination is discrimination. Okay, now back to the zombie movie....

- If you were going to be killed by any movie villain or monster who or what would it be? What would your last words be?
Ingrid Pitt in Vampire Lovers....or Countess Dracula for that matter. I imagine my last words would be something like "a little to the left..."

- What advice can you give to any new film makers reading this?
Don't put too much stock in the opinion of someone who has only directed two feature films. Beyond that, I'd say decide why you're making a movie and then who you are making it for. If you're just looking to get on the map as a director then go to your local video store and pick-up five or six of the most generic looking horror films you can find. Study their structure, elements (violence, sex, production values) and design your film to fit your resources. If your technical skills are strong, you'll end up with a financially viable property. Or, you can experiment and take your chances. Both are equally valid ways to approach a film, just be honest with yourself about what you're doing. However, if you believe nothing else I say believe this...the lower budget your film, the greater your love must be. R&J was like dropping a bomb on my financial and personal life. It's not worth doing if you don't love it like a child.

- What advice would you give to any potential victim in a horror film?
It could have been worse, you could have made a low-budget film.

- Have you made any New Year resolutions and if so what are they?
I'm going to be better to the people in my life. I'd like to go the year without hurting anyone. Something happened after I turned thirty and I became so self-centered I'm thinking of breaking-up with myself. When I look back on 2009, I'd like to see the person I'd like to be.....that or I'll learn to play the banjo.

- Zombie Shakespeare v zombie Charles Dickens?
Depends on the characters. I'm pretty sure Zombie Romeo could take Zombie Oliver Twist. Zombie Othello would work Zombie Nicholas Nickleby (although a film on the subject would run six hours.) But, I think Zombie Scrooge would devastate Zombie Puck. Christmas Carol is halfway to a zombie flick anyway.

- What film do you first remember watching?
How have I never though of that question before? Remember clearly? Probably Star Wars. Aren't I unique. But, I have flashes of a film earlier than that. I don't know what it was called. It was an animation of some sort, I think maybe stop-motion. All I remember is that there was a sort of evil character who carried a sack and if boys or girls were bad, he would turn them into mice and stuff them in said sack. That's all I remember and I don't swear to the facts or even the existence of this movie. Maybe it was just a nightmare that I now think was a film. If anyone out there knows what I'm talking about I'd appreciate some assistance.

- You favourite film of 2008?
Between post on Spike's films, R&J and about ten other projects I worked in the last quarter of 2008, I haven't had a chance to see a lot of what was out there. I'm playing catch-up right now and I'd have to say so far it's The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Although I must point out that Kate Winslet kills in The Reader.

- Salted or sweet popcorn?
Parmesan cheese. Blame my mother, I've been conditioned since birth.

- You will next be appearing in Klown Kamp Massacre as Liberal Larry. Can you tell us some more about that? What do you find tricker - being in front of the camera or behind it?
I think there's no question that I'm far better behind the camera. I haven't done a lot of film acting, but I do enjoy it. My part in Klown Kamp is small. I play the liberal side of two clown pundits arguing on TV. Dave Valdez (the director) sat myself and a saucy gentlemen by the name of Lucien Sims down in front of the camera and just let us go. Lucien and I tend to argue and yell at each other naturally so it didn't take long to shoot. I have a larger supporting actor role in Barry Alexander Brown's new film Last Looks. It's a mockumentary about a horror film crew shooting in Turkey. Things go wrong and some unseen force starts killing the cast and crew for real. That was a lot of fun. Four weeks on location in Turkey. If you
google my name, you can still find articles about how I was killed on a boat while shooting a film a few years back. It was part of a marketing stunt at Cannes. A press release was sent out and the AP picked up on it. I think the LA Times even ran it. It didn't take long to be debunked. Some people thought it was funny and some people seemed personally outraged by it. It never ceases to amaze me what people will get mad about on the internet. Not just opinionated...I mean MAD. PARMESAN CHEESE!!! WHAT A F*#@!% IDIOT!!!

- If you ever won an Oscar who would you thank in the acceptance speech?
My parents of course, whoever was saintly enough to give me money, you for being the first reporter to ever let me ramble on in an interview this long and Ginnifer Goodwin, whom I will undoubtably have meet by then and fostered a meaningful relationship based on mutual love and respect. What? Like this question is clearly concerned with reality. Sorry, I just caught up on Big Love. New season starts next week!

- What is your next film as a director going to be?
I would pay good money to know the answer to that question. I have a number of scripts that are 90% ready to go, but like all things, it depends on financing. It could be anything from a horror/comedy called Plush to a tense sci-fi drama called The Children of Earth. There was a feature film that I shot before R&J but will complete post sometime this year called Chase the Slut. It's a dramedy (I hate that word, but it applies for brevity) about a young woman who must seduce a church going boy to satisfy a bet with her best friend. It's sort of a modern version of Dangerous Liaisons, but instead of her being considered a great lover, she's labeled a slut. Hurray, gender politics! Its writer/star is Vannesa Claire Smith who is enjoying some success in the LA theatre scene right now with Louis & Keely Live at the Sahara. You can see a trailer on YouTube or my website, thirdstarfilms.com. It should start hitting festivals late this year.

- When and where will we be able to see Romeo & Juliet vs The Living Dead?
We just started submitting to festivals, so we won't know about that for a little while. At the very least, it should be available on Netflix before 2010 (good lord that year sounds like it should be more than just one year away.) People can email us at rj@thirdstarfilms.com to be added to a mailing list. We'll send out updates for screenings as well as distribution news.

- Thanks for your time Ryan. Good luck with the film.


There you have it. If you are interested in seeing R&JvTLD sign up for the mailing list. I'll keep posting info about it as well. Can anyone out there help Ryan with that weird film he vaguely remembers?

Previous Interviews: Kenny Carpenter, Neal Asher and the creators of Able

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Monday, 20 October 2008

Star Wars Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back (1980) - Movie Review


Director: Irvin Kershner
Starring: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Billy Dee Williams, David Prowse, James Earl Jones, Peter Mayhew, Anthony Daniels, Kenny Baker.
Running Time: 127 minutes
Score: 10 /10

Here is the next installment of Alan's marathon review through the Star Wars movies.

In the last issue of Empire magazine, there was a countdown of the top 500 films that have ever been made as voted for by film makers, critics and go-ers alike. Their aim? To filter down and sift out all the films that has ever been made and see which came out top.

It would therefore come to no surprise to you all that The Empire Strikes Back came in at No. 3 in the overall list. No mean feat in context and also, no surprise.

It is widely agreed that this film is the best Star Wars film that has been made in the double trilogies. Again, no surprise there, as this film has it all.

Not only does it have some light hearted humour to try and humanise the characters even more than the original, it also has large and grandiose set pieces – The Empire’s attack on Hoth, the Falcon’s escape through the asteroid field, Luke’s training on Dagobah, Cloud City in Bespin and the culmination of the film with the biggest ever twist known at the time and possibly since.

This film is the classic example of taking a good film and making it even better. There is a saying around Tinsletown that you can’t make a sequel better than the original. Not only did this film break that saying into a thousand pieces, it also set the bar for all other sequels to attempt to equal. To my mind, this has still to be done.

This film is more polished and the special effects are significantly improved from A New Hope. Also, the fact that George Lucas didn’t direct or solely write the screenplay for this is also a contributing factor. I’m not saying that Lucas is a poor director – THX 1138 and American Graffiti put paid to that – but I feel that when Kerschner took over the reins as director, he helped put it on an even keel and took the film forward.

Empire also served as an excellent vehicle for character development. We saw Luke emerging as this raw and fledgling-like Jedi, the love between Han and Leia blossoming in difficult circumstances, the introduction of new characters – Yoda, Lando and everyone’s personal favourite, Boba Fett.

However, the fulcrum of this whole film, and what basically propelled it as everyone’s favourite SW film, is the scene in the depths of Cloud City. Luke and Vader have had the most intense lightsaber fight and Luke has been battered and bruised by Vader’s supreme handling of the Force. Not only has Vader cornered Luke into an outpost, he has also taken his right hand as the fight culminated. Already, we can see the device that the two of them are connected in some way. And then the conversation:

“…Obi-wan never told you what happened to your Father”
“He told me enough, he told me that you killed him!”
“No, I am your Father!”

It is at that moment that got everyone hooked on the Star Wars franchise and has spawned four more sequels, countless merchandising opportunities and Leia in a gold bikini…God bless you George Lucas!

As with all reviews, you have to find a mid-level; look for the good as well as the bad. As I am sitting here, I’m racking my brains furiously trying to think of a negative on this film. I can quite easily say that I cannot think of one. This film quite rightly deserves its place in the top 3 films of all time.

10/10 – A timeless piece of film that forever brings out the schoolboy in all of us!

PS. If you want to know who beat Empire to the top two positions, Raiders of the Lost Ark was at No. 2 and The Godfather (Part 1) was at No. 1. Can’t really disagree with that!

What do you think of that?

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Best Fight Scene Ever Part 10 - Family Guy - Chicken Fight

Thanks to Alan S for suggesting this one. What do you think of it?

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Monday, 13 October 2008

Best Fight Scene Ever Part 3 - The opening scene in Blade

Poor deluded fool thinks he has made it with a foxy lady. She takes him to a disco hidden within a slaughterhouse. The music starts, blood pumps from the sprinkler system and the vampires raise their arms. Enter Blade....with hilarious consequences!

Cheers to Alan S for suggesting this one. What do you think of this scene? What is your favourite fight scene?

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Wednesday, 8 October 2008

Conspiracy Fail - Beware of the rainbows

Not in the slightest bit film related but it made me laugh out loud. I think the woman talking is totally serious about her amazing discovery of the evil machinations perpetrated by her government. Thanks to Alan S for sending me the link.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the matter.

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Friday, 15 August 2008

Star Wars: A New Hope, Episode IV (1977) - Movie Review

Director: George Lucas
Starring: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Sir Alec Guinness, David Prowse and James Earl Jones
Running Time: 121 Minutes

Score: 8/10

Here's the next installment of Alan S's Star Wars review

Welcome once again, dear friends, to a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. This is part four (or should that be part IV?) on my journey through the Star Wars galaxy, and surrounding star systems.

Episode IV A new Hope, or Star Wars (as it should be called), was the first made instalment of the Star Wars saga back in 1977 and was the brainchild of the bearded one, George Lucas.

The fact that on the opening crawl, Lucas adds that it is “Episode IV” at the very top of the crawl would have got brains working overtime back in ’77. What? Have I missed the first three episodes? Is there more to this story than meets the eyes…that is certainly the impression that Lucas wants to give. The fact that you dive straight into the story, with only a brief description of what’s going on, before the feast for the eyes that is the Imperial Battle Cruiser going on and on and on. Apparently, people in the audience were cheering that opening sequence, back in the day, and were overawed by the, well, awesomeness of what they were seeing.

But I digress. The thing that really pained me, and I mean, REALLY pained me, was that Lucas had thought of this as the first part of one story – I believe it was nine episodes that he originally wanted to do – and yet there are HUGE flaws right throughout this film. Now, if this was a stand-alone film, or was added by the compliment that was Empire Strikes Back and the burp that was Return of the Jedi, then it would have worked, just.

However, this part of the story is just meant to be the next step in the Skywalker clan’s story. Why, then, was Vader referred to as just “Darth” by Obi-Wan Kenobi on the Death Star? Why was Vader merely a bit of a gopher for Grand Moff Tarkin (excellently played by Peter Cushing)? Why did Luke have the hots for his sister? Why did Obi-Wan not recognise R2-D2 and C-3P0? Why, why, why!!

I’ll tell you the reason why. The reason why, is that the prequels of this double trilogy should NEVER have been made. It’s like writing a new section of the bible that track’s Mary and Joseph’s life from childhood to giving birth to Jesus. It just should NOT be done!

If we are to truly take this saga, from Ep. I to Ep. VI, to be one long story, then Lucas must have us all painted as fools. It doesn’t fit. It’s like trying to get a square block into a round hole. There are still discrepancies from A New Hope to the other films in the Original Trilogy. The whole film just seems to stick out like a sore thumb.

However, I am talking about, what some people still refer to as their favourite film of all time. This film is one of the standout masterpieces of film in the last 40 years. To audiences in the late 70’s, this was the pinnacle of film-making and special effects. Granted, they look a bit naff now, but back then, they were the dog’s back-wheels and this has been it’s ever-lasting legacy.
The reason that this film is still loved and revered by all is that it simply blew anything and everything out of the water. Nothing at that time, or for years after, could come close to this film and it was simply concreted in that number one position when it’s two sequels came out in 1980 and in 1983. It was the start of a journey that many kids wondered at and wished that they were able to fly X-wings, or meet Greedo in a cantina.

It’s now seems to come as no surprise that the executive’s at 20th Century Fox allowed Lucas to retain all the rights to marketing and certain percentages from any sequels that were made. Lucas must also have thought that it would be a one off, his singular triumph, but hedged his bets, and he came up trumps.

It is now unfortunate that he used his nous to try and cash in by making the prequel films and ruin this film. A New Hope must feel the sticky and clawing palm prints of the prequel trilogy all over it. I, for one, would not like to be in its shoes.

Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope – 8/10

Discuss in the forum.

Tuesday, 5 August 2008

5 Word Reviews

Some 5 Word Reviews from a load of people. If you have any email them to me.

Daniel
Kung Fu Panda
- Fat Panda saves the day - 9/10


Paul
Jaws
- big fish eats people, grrrrr - 10/10
Pale Rider - horses, guns, cigars, tunes, Eastwood - 8/10
Oceans 11 - poor mans Goodfellas, good gadgets - 7/10
Platoon - untouchable Nam movie, very harsh - 10/10
Apocalypse Now - hunt for drug-addled cottonwool-stuffed Brando - 9/10
Jacobs Ladder - intense-trippery, beware of flashbacks! - 8/10
Porkys - the original bawdy teen movie - 6/10
The Blues Brothers - shades, songs, chases and chuckles - 6/10
Hulk (Ang Lee) - intensely disappointing, very slow, yawnville - 4/10 (btw, is Ang Lee the Chinese subtitle?)
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon - lightweight kung-fu movie, overrated, yawnville - 5/10
The Dirty Dozen - stick it to the Nazi's - 5/10
Starship Troopers - high ammo usage, in space /10
X-Men - really enjoyable Marvel Mutant mayhem - 8/10
Leon - neglected classic, Gary Oldman excels - 9/10
The Fifth Element - Bruce Willis in space-taxi yarn - 7/10
Akira - The Undisputed GodFather Of Manga - 10/10
Ghost in the Shell - mondern Manga with cutting edge - 8/10
Ring - original good, remake bad, spooksville - 7/10
Army of Darkness - comic horror, funny gory romp - 6/10
300 - blood, swords, sandles. seriously bloody - 8/10
Sin City - beautifully visual film noir. excellent - 10/10
Pulp Fiction - gimp bums big black baddie - 10/10
Jackie Brown - absorbing and clevery constructed. long - 7/10
Lethal Weapon - dross 80's american cop movie - 4/10
Caddyshack - angry golf-playing beaver gets 'Chevy-Chased' - 6/10 - submitted by 'other' phil (PD)
Ghostbusters - Giant Marshmellow gets uber toasted - 8/10
Jason & the Argonauts - Mythical Greek Hero kicks ass - 7/10 - other phil (PD)
Pretty Woman - street whore becomes posh whore - 0/10
Witness - bearded blokes chased by Solo - 2/10
D.A.R.Y.L. - Jonny Nemonic's Dad steals plane - 8/10 (ps, i'm sure he did steal a plane!)

Alan S
The Phantom
- 2/10 - "Zane is poor man's Batman"
A.I. - 4/10 - "Spielberg's warped vision of future"
Jaws - 9.5/10 - "Spielberg triumph that terrorised millions"

Del
A.I. - Please, please, please, please finish, 2/10
Jaws - dont go into the water 8/10


Discuss in the forum.

Friday, 1 August 2008

Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003), Episode 3 - Revenge of the Sith (2005). DVD Review



The next installment of Alan S's review of all things Star Wars.
Double Review on The Clone Wars DVD (Series One and Two) and Episode III: Revenge of the Sith.

Could this be an interweb/bloggy thing first? A double review on two different mediums? Here’s hoping!

As some of you, my most learned colleagues, may know, I have undergone Japanese water-torture of a sort and have decided to post my reviews based on the vast universe that George Lucas has churned out over the past three decades.

And so, after watching the car-crash that was Episode II, I took a rather unusual turn of going straight to Genndy Tartakovsky’s 2004 Emmy Award winning TV series that is The Clone Wars.

Lets get a couple of things straight here before I start in earnest. This is NOT a movie in it’s own right. It was originally split up into 20 ‘episodes’ that ran for approx three mins a time (Series One) and then later, to five 12-15 min ‘episodes’ (Series Two) and were shown on the Cartoon Network. This, in itself, should immediately consign it to the “Not worth wasting my time” bin at your local HMV.

However, watching the ‘episodes’ back to back on a DVD release produces an hour long animation film that runs as smoothly as any manga or anime film. And this is its best point.

Having received canon status by all at Skywalker Ranch, these animated shorts act to flesh out all the major players in the Clone Wars and also to give a bit more background on the one’s we don’t know that much about (Jedi’s Shaak Ti, Kit Fisto and Ki-Adi-Mundi to name but three.)

The most impressive thing though, in my eyes, was to show how the Clone Troopers acted during wartime. When we think about Storm-troopers from the Original Trilogy, we think of them as clumsy, easily manipulated and poor shots. In these shorts, though, you can see why Jedi Master Sifo Dyas approached Jango Fett to act as the clone template. These guys are badass! There is one section of action on Series One that shows the Clone Troopers infiltrating a Separtist City and not ONE word is uttered. It’s all fist clenching, finger pointing and military precision from Commander Cody and his cronies!

Series Two is more there to explain Anakin’s rise to power and fame as a Jedi Knight; his exploits making him a hero to all he fights for. He loves the power and adulation he gets from the million of beings he has saved. Series Two also acts as the springboard to launch General Grievous into our consciousness.

The animation in both series is of a very high standard with lots of mute colours, to signify the oppression of war and the only flashes of real colour come from the heroes’ and villains’ lightsabers. I mentioned Manga before and these series come across as Manga’s younger brother, who’s trying to impress.

The voice acting, on the other hand, is in need of improvement and does kind of stall your enjoyment of it.

One of the reason’s I have decided to do a double review on these is that the two mediums (animation and live action film) is that the end of Series Two immediately preceeds the opening scrawl of Episode III.

When you are plunged into the sumptiousness of the battle taking place high above Courascant, you are instantly reminded of why you are a Star Wars fan. The explosions, the crazy manoeuvres on both sides of the battle, the sheer attention to detail just blow you away.

Granted, Episode III is a bit like its other bedfellows of Ep I and II. It’s all pomp, but no ceremony. Yes, the CGI is amazing, yes the battles between Jedi and Sith are as good as we will ever see, but, again, it fails to spark the imagination as the Original Trilogy did.

Some of the characters are weak. General Grievous, for example, is a wheezing coward who does not seem to add anything to the struggle (although in the Clone Wars series, he kick’s everyone’s butt from here to Dantooine!) Even Emperor Palpatine loses some of his nastiness after his Force lightning metamorphosis. Before his transformation, he is the ultimate puppet master, working everything from behind the scenes. McDairmid plays that part to a tee. Portman was another one who just didn’t come to the party.

As we all know, the good guy has to go bad and the lightsaber fight on Mustafar does not disappoint. It’s dark, moody, there is shouting and consternation between Vader and Kenobi and how the being that we came to fear is created, is finally played out before our eyes.

In a strange quirk of fate, there are some who say that the Clone Wars is a better story with more flesh to it that it’s live action counterpart. I say that there cannot be one without the other. Episode III makes more sense after you have watched the Clone Wars immediately before it. For example, you find out why Grievous has that annoying cough. Tartakovsky can be proud of his addition to the SW Universe

And so, dear friends, I have reached the end of the journey that is Prequel Land. Stay tuned as I go into the realms that is Original Trilogy land and rejoice as we, once again, walk with Wookies, princess’, farm boys and scruffy looking Nerf-herders.

Clone Wars: 8/10
Episode III: 7/10 – purley because you get the chill up your spine when you hear Vader breathe for the first time!


Discuss in the forum.

Thursday, 17 July 2008

A funny thing happened.....

We now have a forum. That's right True Believer's. You asked for it you got it. Now you can discuss all the news, reviews and other things to your heart's content. Did you agree with Alan S's review of Episode 1 and 2? Do you think Outlander looks great or a big pile of Viking poo? Is Chisholm the hardest man in movies? All this and more is now at your fingertips.

Feel free to start any topic if the review you want to talk about isn't up yet.

Want more? Well how about a chance to discuss your favourite or worst film of all time? There is also the never ending movie script. Basically, you read the previous parts of it then write the next part. That should keep you going for now. Any suggestions for other forums or topics let me know.

Discuss in the forum.

Tuesday, 15 July 2008

Star Wars: Episode 2 - Attack of the Clones, 2002 - DVD Review


Director: George "Wamprat" Lucas
Starring: Hayden Christensen, Natalie Portman, Ewan McGregor, Samuel L Jackson, Ian McDairmid, Christopher Lee & Frank Oz
Running Time: 142 Minutes

Score:6/10
Here's part two of Alan S's review of the Star Wars universe.

After yesterday’s attempt at committing, what felt like, suicide by saying that The Phantom Menace was actually not a bad film, from a certain point of view, I now seem to have a death wish that compelled me to watch the second episode in the prequel Star Wars trilogy; namely Attack of the Clones.

Here, we are now 10 years after the Battle of Naboo and young Anakin Skywalker is coming towards the end of his tutelage under Obi-Wan (or so he feels). Another failed attempt on the life of the now Senator Amidala throws their lives back together again.

The feel of the film is quite lush at the beginning. Full sweeping sets with velvet and leathers in cool creams and deep reds and purples really live up to the pomp and ceremony of Coruscant. Lucas also expands on the city/planet with a great speeder chase and even onto the never before seen planet surface with its gaudy neon lights and clubs (You wanna but some deathsticks?)

And it is at this point in the film that Lucas takes the film in a direction that has not been taken before. The film then gives a big nod to film noir with Obi-Wan going on a Sam Spade style investigation, complete with greasy spoon cafés (his meeting with Dex) and terse conversations with Jango Fett about his recent movements. You could almost imagine the dialogue was directly lifted from a 1940’s serial film starring Humphrey Bogart.

While Kenobi does his best to smoke Gauloises, keep whiskey in his filing cabinet and produce inner soliloquies, Anakin and Padmé embark on the ultimately disastrous love affair that spawns Luke and Leia. One thing for sure is his persistence. On no fewer that four occasions does he crash and burn after his post-teenage attempts at pick-up lines. Most mere mortals would have bailed after the first or second attempt.

What Lucas does, to not too bad a level, is have two parts of one story arc off in different directions to be brought back together again on the insect planet of Geonosis (Starship Troopers anyone?) However, it’s at this point that the two parts start to unravel.

The sudden arrival of all the clones in Storm Trooper outfits beggar’s belief. The god awful puns uttered by C-3PO when his head and body become detached are straight out of a child’s joke book. But what I want to focus on here is the crow-barred attempt to keep the fan-boys drooling.

At the finale, when Dooku (which means “poison” in Japanese, for those in the know) and Yoda face off, Dooku comments, without so much as a nod or a wink to camera, that thier knowledge of the Force can’t be separated, so let’s duel with Lightsabers….Oh. Dear. God! Don’t force it upon us! If you are going to let it happen, let it happen naturally!

But I digress. The fore-shadowing of events yet to come arrive thick and fast enough to keep the fans interested enough to chuckle at their own knowledge. Anakin starting on the slippery slope to the Dark side is all too apparent and is the clear nexus of the film.

And this is where I will make my final point. One of the best things that Lucas, in his infinite wisdom, did was to keep the story going throughout the Clone Wars with the animated series (which I shall watch tonight) as Episode II and Episode III are merely the same story split into two. The same feelings, emotions and all round feel to it suggest this.

So, my dear Live-for-Films colleagues, I am really just in hiatus on this review. I shall keep you posted on my continuing mission in a galaxy far, far away.

I’ll give this 6/10. A slightly disappointing addition, but wonderful to watch…bit like a train wreck.

Mad Rabbits Make 30 Second Movie Spoofs


Do you like cartoon bunnies? Do you like movies? Do you like funny? If the answer is "Er, maybe!" then this could be the site for you.

Angry Alien Productions make 30 second cartoons of all your favourite films starring funny bunny rabbits (anything that isn't a bunny has bunny ears tied to their head, that includes the Death Star).

There are some really good ones one there. Worth checking out are The Exorcist, Office Space, Raiders of the Last Ark, and Reservoir Dogs (both the bleeped and unbleeped version).

Thanks to Alan S for pointing this one out.

Monday, 14 July 2008

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace, 1999 - DVD Review

Director: George "Ewok" Lucas
Starring: Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman, Ian McDairmid, Samuel L Jackson & Frank Oz
Running Time: 133 Minutes
Score: 7/10
Thanks to Alan S for sending this one in.

Picture the scene; Friday the 16th August 1999 and myself and my girlfriend at the time go to the evening showing on the first day of the UK release of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace. The obligatory popcorn and soft drink are bought for around the £15 mark, the screaming kids are kicking the back of your chair, the teenagers in front of you are talking far too loudly and are throwing popcorn kernels at the other group of teenagers sat two rows in front of them who are talking even louder. The 25 minutes of adverts for local Indian restaurants, carpet warehouses and local opticians flash past your eyes. The trailers for new and upcoming films – Austin Powers 2, South Park, The Exorcist: Anniversary Release goes by, with you making snap judgements based on 90 seconds of the best bits of the film. Then hush descends. The curtain’s at the side of the screen widen and the one at the top drops to give you the “envelope” perspective. The BBFC certificate comes up to say the film has been classified….then black. The drum roll at the start of the 20th Century Fox intro cracks into life followed by the Lucasfilm logo shining green to gold. Even through all these trials and tribulations, I turn to my girlfriend and I whisper “I’ve been waiting 16 years for this moment!”

So why, therefore, had I suffered the slings and arrows of a Liverpool cinema on a Friday evening? Because I had to. As a young man who was brought up on Star Wars, it was almost written into my male genetic code to do it.

And yet, I was disappointed. John Williams’ score seemed to seep through every single scene when it just didn’t need to be there. McGregor’s accent, although a good try, was no substitute for Guinness’ dulcet tones. Jake Lloyd was wooden and Neeson just didn’t “feel” like a Jedi. You will notice I have not mentioned Jar Jar as everyone feels exactly the same way about him (The image of a Magnum pistol and his temple spring to mind.)

And so, I persevered throughout the film. At the end, although I felt full, it was like I had eaten a Chinese banquet – I’d feel hungry again in 10 minutes time. I bought it on video (such a strange concept these days) and also bought it on DVD when it came out. The male genetic code could not be altered.

Fast forward, then, almost 9 years to the day of first watching the film – last Saturday to be exact (12th July) – and me and my flat mate talk about watching the films in chronological order from I to VI, with the Clone War animated series as a stop-gap between II and III. Now granted, this is NOT the first time I have seen the film since that fateful night in Liverpool, I have watched it many times before, but this is the first time I have regaled this story.

What struck me most was how much I actually enjoyed this film. What had seemed to singularly pass me by all the times I had watched it before were the “firsts” that had never been in the SW universe before.

This was the first time anyone had seen a “proper” lightsaber duel. Not the subtle prodding’s and parrying’s from the original trilogy, but a full whirling dervish that was Darth Maul and his double lightsaber and proper use of the Force whilst fighting. Seamless sections of the film where you actually felt like it was real – The Pod-race, for example, is greater than any car/chariot/motorbike chase I have ever seen. Coruscant, the city planet with it’s never ending ribbons of traffic and buildings reaching the sky. The Senate, the Jedi Council, the seeds of the Empire that we all came to fear and loathe as children….everything!

And that was when it hit me. Yes, this film is more directed to children with one of the main protagonists being a 10 year old boy and nearly every line of dialogue telling you what’s happening at that moment. But this is exactly it. Were we not once of that age; being swept away on a tidal wave of aliens, spaceships, princesses and villains? Of course we were and is was exactly who this film was being tilted at. What we also need to remember is that this is the first of a double trilogy. We need a starting point and from a certain point of view (sorry, pun intended!) this delivers it to a tee.

Sure, the acting is a bit ropey at times and the dialogue is, well, I believe Harrison Ford said it best when he said “George, you can type this shit, but you can’t say it!”

But taking these two and putting them to one side, this is a solid piece of work and is a worthy contributor to the Star Wars universe. For one of those with this film written into his genetic code, I truly have been turned back to the Light side of the Force.

Thursday, 10 July 2008

5 Word Reviews

Chris
Monty Python and the Holy Grail - 8 /10 The knights who say 'ni'
The Lawnmower Man - 4 /10 Great at time, crap now
Blood Diamond - 9 /10 DeCaprios Best Performance to Date
Cypher - 7.5 /10 Amnesia, espionage, giant cigar tubes!
A Knight's Tale - 8 /10 Medieval modern day comedy romance!?
Phone Booth - 6 /10 Colin Farrel in a box

Paul
Clockwork Orange
- violent, pacey, queer, classical, alright - 6/10
The Dark Crystal - Dark Henson breeds Kermit Killers - 7/10
The Bone Collector - surprisingly good, poor mans Seven - 6/10
Fargo - timeless masterpiece set in snow - 8/10
Top Gun - bit gay, nice planes - 8/10

Alan S
Clockwork Orange - 8/10 - "Bit of the old Ultra-violence"
The Dark Crystal - 7/10 - "Jim Henson's finest hour"
The Bone Collector - 6/10 - "Quadraplegic Washington instructs rookie Jolie"
Fargo - 9/10 - "Modern day classic - with snow"
Top Gun - 5/10 - "A chick flick for guys"
Hostel - 7/10 - "Never go back packing alone!"
The Fast and the Furious - 2/10 - "Chewing gum for the eyes"
Napoleon Dynamite - 8/10 - "Surreally funny - Vote for Pedro!"
Monty Python and the Holy Grail - 9/10 - "Arthurian tale with a surreal twist"
A Knight's Tale - 4/10 "Jousting to a Queen-esque soundtrack"
Phone Booth - 7/10 - "Crackling with tension; claustrophobic situation"

Andy D
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
- L.M.F.A.O. 9/10

Rich
Holy Grail
– Bloodthirsty Bunnies in Arthurian Antics 9/10
Lawnmower Man – Before-Bond Brosnan’s Binary Bore. 2/10

Thursday, 26 June 2008

Make your own McLovin Fake ID

For those fans of Superbad and, in particular, the ones who liked McLovin and his bogus driving licence then take a look here.
Yes that's right true believer, you can make your own McLovin ID and go and buy a keg of beer.
Thanks to Alan for sending me the link and also letting me use his McLovin card above. Yes ladies he is over 21!